Yes, yes she still breathes. Sleeping on her right side now. She woke up 6 hours ago. Too much pain to stay awake. I asked her on a scale from 1-10 how's the pain? She said 9. I bet that wouldn't be true by my standard. I would give it a 5. But that just goes to show how different we are. Mummy is like a baby.
The nurse graciously pumped some pain killers in the IVs. Drip..Drip..the droplets seeped into the wretched object lodged on her chest...what do they call it? Oh yes a portacath...What a blessing it is...this small medical appliance is installed beneath the skin...through it drugs can be injected..usually with less discomfort than a needle stick....yes yes less discomfort...but imagine lying in bed with long tubes of drip drip connected to your body...turn left..opps no can do..how about right...yes but need some help please so the wretched tubes don't engulf her neck...
I want her to be comfortable....but she can't even freely roll over from side to side in bed....not only does she need help (a little push to roll over and a night gown tuck) but with those tubes hanging in the way..how can anyone move....sternly one of us must say "no..you can't do that" add that to the list of can't dos. That reminds me, I almost killed her today. Why you ask? I made her a Turkey sandwich for breakfast, her favorite...completely forgetting that her liver can no longer synthesize proteins. Add another can't to the list: she can't eat protein. And when she asked why? My sister said "the doctor said you can't eat protein." Carol, couldn't you just tell her we ran out? I mean if we're going to pretend she's getting better than why bind her in doctor rules? What's the point of living without freedom? She must feel trapped in a bubble to slow death....yet she doesn't even know....Turkey Breakfast Close call that was, I would have been blamed for a life time. Which makes it so much easier abandon "my?" responsibilities or obligations as the eldest sister.
No comments:
Post a Comment